Rollin' on the River

Thank God I've watched my fair share of Man vs. Wild.

Last weekend, my friends and I were camping near Winthrop, WA, and we had plans to float the Methow River. Excited at the prospect of end-of-season sales, we decided to purchase our own flotation devices at Big 5.  For just $34.99, we got rafts that would hold two people each.  They came with oars and an air pump FTW.  There was even enough room for an ice chest full of Bud Light Lime and Coors Light. (Yes, I call them "ice chests" as opposed to "coolers," and yes, I enjoy a frosty Bud Light Lime and tapping the rockies from time to time.)

We set out on the river around 1pm for what was supposed to be a 3 hour float. There were 9 people in my immediate group, not including a dog.  Our friend had organized the float (about 30 people total).  Unbeknownst to all of us, the river was approximately 1 foot lower than it had been the week before when the organizer had floated it.  As a result, considerably more rocks and other obstacles were exposed.  These created some rapids that were somewhat difficult for a $34.99 raft to navigate.

I was in said raft with my friend Jenni; we popped one of the bottom compartments within 5 minutes of being on the river. Luckily, one of the compartments survived, but we had to spend the rest of the float yelling "asses up" every time we approached exposed rocks  (which was frequently). In between the rapids, we used empty coors light cans to bail out water.

Long story short, we made it ¾ of the way through the float before we had completely sunk two rafts and put a hole the size of a baseball  in the bottom of a third. This meant that the 9 people and a dog who had started the trip with 8 flotation devices had to finish with 6 flotation devices.  Moreover, the largest flotation devices were the ones that had sunk or were taking on water.  Time to cuddle up!

We made one last push down the river before we had to give up entirely.  Going through mild rapids with 400lbs of people and dog on a raft with a weight limit of 350lbs and a giant hole in the bottom just wasn't going to work.  Not only did we have no idea how much further the take out spot was, but the sun was about 40 minutes away from dropping behind a hill – meaning it was going to get cold quick.

We were about to resort to hitchhiking along the side of Hwy 20, but luckily, we met some nice campers who offered us more coors light and a ride back to town to get our cars.  Crisis averted!  Bear Grylls would be proud.